Seiring dan Sejalan, No More.

Had a lengthy discussion with a friend of mine, yesterday. Apparently, she was on the verge of getting a divorce. The D word is no stranger to myself. What amazed me was how she spoke in a very cool manner. Not that she was heartless or anything, but how she sounded so firm. Tried to share my thoughts with her, of how hell it would be if she decided to go ahead with the divorce. Financially, mentally and physically she will be drained out. And this won't just affect her, but her 8 year old girl and a baby son, too. As a friend, I tried to talk her out of it, scaring her a bit, but she sounded adamant with her decision. She tried to justify her option by sharing with me her torments.

"Being married for more than 10 years and suffering halfway through it, wasn't a joyride", she muttered.

Apparently, she was lying to herself for 5 years in order to save their marriage. And marriage is suppose to bring out the best in you, but in her case, more of hindering of her true self from coming out. Now that's mental torture. Plus, eventhough they worked in the same industry, and yet, there was no true communications between them. Sad but true.

Divorce rate among the Malays are bloody high. In 2004, a total of 16,509 were recorded, compared to year 2000, with 13,536 cases. A staggering 21% increase in 4 years! In 2004, Selangor leads the pack, with 3,136 cases and shockingly, Kelantan comes in second, with 1,952 followed by Johor, 1,690.

http://www.kpwkm.gov.my/panel/Upload/Jad%206.4.pdf

Before we hung up, I wished her well and all the happiness. She was calm, eventhough I could tell from her voice, she was under immense stress. I knew she had to make the decision, come what may. I guess, sometimes, in some cases, separation is the best.